“look! it’s snowing…so pretty”…“lets go some place cozy”…“i can’t wait to wear a sweater”…we have to tolerate listening to our co-workers and loved ones musings about winter from around the end of october to mid january and it’s torture. yes, it’s true…the deuxmoi gals have SAD. we have a disorder and the only cure (in our case) is to move to some place like florida (not happening, we love to hate you nyc). millions of people are inflicted with SAD, also known as the winter blues, so we have come up with some tips on how to lift your spirits and banish this nasty disorder, none of which involve hibernation or eating your feelings (side note: we love our bed)…
take cabs everywhere…you don’t need to be out in this oppressive weather any longer than it takes for you to walk from your front door to the curb. also, it will ensure that you arrive at your destination looking tight because looking the most gorgina in any room is the cure for everything. snow and sleet hampered hair is not a cute look…either is hat head if you were about to argue that point.
don’t compromise fashion…because you will be taking cabs everywhere you can still wear the sickest shoes, no matter what mother nature is throwing down. why should a little precipitation limit your footwear options? everyone will be all “how do you walk in those with the snow?!?”…guess what, i don’t walk and it’s fabulous.
buy and heavily use any beauty products that remind you of happier times (i.e. drinking rose and not having to wear a coat)…a combo of bobbi brown’s beach, skin trip coconut body lotion and frederic fekkai oceanique tousled wave spray will have people drawn to you like a bee to honey and your aroma will be their sweet nectar.
it’s super chic to wear a humongous fur (or faux fur) coat everywhere with the skimpiest of outfits underneath (i.e. a spaghetti strap silk cami or slip dress). everyone will be asking “aren’t you SO cold?”…no, duh you took a cab. again, don’t let the climate dictate your look. that’s SO tyrannical of mother nature and she doesn’t own you! this feeling of satisfaction will be an instant mood lifter while you are surrounded by pedestrians in their wool sweaters and turtlenecks.
be tan. however you go about achieving that glow (bed, faux, real UVA rays) just do it. nothing says “fuck you SAD” like bronzed skin.
if you’re stuck indoors watch a feel good movie that will teach you something about the world, like wall street (the original). nothing will make you feel better about yourself than watching charlie sheen before the drugs really fucked with his brain (and face). also, any movie with a plot that contains revenge or a fall from grace will be sure to renew your hope in mankind.
retail therapy is not called “therapy” for nothing…so use it! the best part of the world wide web is that in this horrific cold you can shop from the comfort of your own home. enjoy each day when a package magically arrives like a present. we don’t think anything gives us a greater high…not even .5 milligrams of xanax and a 2 glasses of sancerre.
have a few cocktails…because isn’t hitting the bottle the answer to all woes.
if you’re friends and family really love you then they will refrain from discussing the following topics during the winter months: the sun, roaring fires, christmas shopping, baking, how it gets dark at 4pm, new years eve, valentines day, kim kardashian, any kardashian, bikini season, cleansing, juicing, traffic, dairy and uggs.